Surprising people

As I have mentioned before, I go to an amazing gym for dilapidated people. Its a combination of PT and a gym and is full of people with ailments. I see people there daily in wheel chairs, on oxygen, and wearing various types of splints and braces. I know most of the people who go there have medical issues and greatly benefit from the additional support, like me.

When you first join, you get assessed by one of the physical therapists - which consist of three of the four owners - and then work with either one of the exercise specialists or one of the PTs to set up an exercise plan. Then every three months you go back to one of the PTs or an exercise specialist to reevaluate your program.

I went to one of the PTs three plus years ago when I joined. Since then, my health has increased its downward spiral and I decided I needed to go back to one of the PTs and start over. I met with one of the two brothers yesterday to do that.

We started by going through which of my body parts have issues and my medical issues which impact my abilities. At the end of the conversation, he turned to me and said "I had no idea you had so much going on. I see you here going through your routine and did not know".

I had surprised him with my ailments and that I am still exercising. At one point, he did say "I'm sorry" and I said "no you are not supposed to say 'I'm sorry'. You aresupposed to say 'That sucks.'"

But I am a little sore after my new routine but I will be back tomorrow.

I was wrong

When I blogged about 'Blogging About Others' on Saturday, I was wrong. I misinterpreted Frances' post. I didn't mean to. Maybe because it is such a touchy topic for me that I misinterpreted it. I got negative feedback from both Frances and another reader. I did go back and clarify my blog post and posted an update as well. This is something I never do. I usually let a post stand as it is without editing.

I do not claim to be perfect. I know I can be critical of others - particularly those who piss me off - but this was not the case. In this case, I was just wrong and I apologize.

What if they started by saying 'I'm Sorry'?

When someone does you wrong - whether by accident or not - what do you really want? Well, first you want them to undo it or take it back. But also you want them to say 'I'm sorry'. It may not solve the problem, it makes you feel better. And if the error was compounded by policy or procedural problems, you want to work to help change the status quo and help prevent the same from happening to others. But the apology is what really helps.

Most people are quick to apologize. However doctors have not been allowed to apologize for errors as they might be taken as admission of guilt in malpractice lawsuits. But what if they could now start with an apology? Would that help? It would for me. If someone does something wrong or something happens that hurts when its not expected, a little apology helps.

When my drain was removed post surgery, I was told 'no problem, it doesn't hurt' by numerous friends, the doctor, and even the nurse who escorted us to the exam room where it was removed. Well they were all wrong. It hurt like hell to put it bluntly. It wasn't a grit your teeth experience, it was worse. My husband said both the doctor and nurse looked surprised and apologetic that it hurt that much. They couldn't say they were sorry about that or 'oops, we didn't expect that'. I would have appreciated that.

There is a new plan by a coalition of Massachusetts hospitals to offer an apology, financial settlement and a cooling off period before any malpractice lawsuit can be filed. And the additional suggestion is made that patients and their families be allowed to participate in committees to help change policy. Hmmm....

An error happens - its part of life.  But what if the doctor could start with I'm sorry without fear of it adding to a lawsuit. And what if people had a choice of financial settlement or had to wait six months before they could file a lawsuit. Maybe this would help slow down the 'ambulance chasing' lawyers who help incite the cases. Maybe this would lower malpractice insurance coverage and help stop forcing doctors out of medicine. I'm sorry if you disagree but I do agree.