Not A Good Idea

Yesterday, I decided I really wasn't feeling well and stayed home with Boots who is not feeling well either. I really wasn't feeling well. Everything ached and I was tired. Not a good day. My husband went off to work around 7 and left us both home (with the other healthy cat) for the day until 5 pm.

So I took care of myself by not exerting myself. I allowed myself to be lazy and have my body aches and pains and fatigue dictate what I did.

The sum total of what I did yesterday consists of watching 3 LMN movies, 2 episodes of Law & Order, and one episode of Property Brothers. I also set up my loom and started weaving with some beautiful chenille yarn. I also went outside to get the mail from the end of the driveway and supervise Boots when he went out for about 30 minutes. Not a lot of exertion.

Boots hung out with me. He went from room to room with me. He did insist on going out briefly (he hates litter boxes and prefers the great outdoors) but came right back in.

By the end of the day I felt a little better. I definitely had not exerted myself. But, and then comes the big 'but'.

On the downside, by staying home and not doing much, I felt totally isolated by the end of the day. I am not up to doing that regularly. I felt cut off from the world. I didn't talk on the phone to friends but had several email and text conversations. I also took care of some things I needed to do on the phone and online.

However, I could not live like that every day. I mean I physically could but would need to get more exercise. But mentally and emotionally, it would be horrible for me. I could see myself getting very depressed quite easily. And if I got deeply depressed that would have all sorts of bad ramifications that I won't even go into here. I am already being treated for 'post cancer' depression - which really should be 'my body fell apart before I was ready' depression.

I am going to call yesterday a learning experience. And one not to be repeated unless I am completely incapacitated and not expected to survive. This also reinforces to me the importance of one's emotional/mental state as compared to your physical state. They are both equally important.

Today, I am going to make sure I do get out and do things. It help that my husband is home. I think I might even go to the gym because I didn't yesterday.

Its Official

Today is going to be a bad day. Everything hurts. I didn't do that much yesterday. But for some reason I have a lot of pain today. My left arm and left side are very sore for some reason plus the rest of my back. (Okay, I did do some gardening and had a friend over for dinner.)

So these are my plans for today (after eating a delicious breakfast my husband made for me and delivered to me so I could eat in bed) are:

• Take a pain pill and wait for it to work
• Match the socks from last week's laundry
• Take a hot shower to help the pain levels
• Eventually meet a friend for coffee.

In the meantime, I think its time for some more bad tv.

Sometimes I Feel I Am Being Lazy

I run into the problem that I feel like I am being lazy because I don't do much during the day often. Yesterday afternoon I felt I should have been doing more than just sit around most of the time. But I really was not up to more. Yesterday I did not have a good day. My right hip and spine were giving me so much pain I spent the afternoon doing a lot of nothing. I even used the drive through at Walgreens to pick up my prescriptions so I didn't have to walk through the store. Maybe I should have taken fewer books out of the library.

I was also really tired from having fun. I think I got about 10 hours of sleep last night. I was also exhausted. Completely exhausted. I need to do a lot more 'laziness' today and try to be productive while not moving around and recovering.

Today I am doing my usual Tuesday schedule which means I have nothing planned. I have to finish doing the laundry but I also need to rest. Usually on Tuesdays I have time to start projects that I can finish over the next few weeks. I think this week I will not start any projects. I will watch my garden grow as I do laundry and a lot of nothing.

And try not to feel lazy. But I need to be lazy. Its called 'recovering'.

What I needed

I originally was going to work yesterday, today and tomorrow this week. But because of office renovations and some home improvement that was supposed to start yesterday, I changed my schedule to Wednesday, Thursday, Friday with Monday and Tuesday at home. (Actually my boss told me Friday not to come in until Wednesday because of the office renovations. And then he called me yesterday to see if I was coming in because he needed me for something. But that's another story.)

Monday I was moderately productive. I went to the gym. I got some work done. I cleaned up the house a bit (for the cleaning lady).

Yesterday, Tuesday, I thought about doing a lot of different things. This is what I did accomplish. I was very lazy.

• I watched probably six episodes of Criminal Minds (the first six to be precise).
• I got some knitting done. I have a craft show in September and want to be sure I have enough non-cold weather items done.
• I sat on the couch and played with the cats.
• I talked to the mason when he showed up.
• I cooked dinner.
• I made a big mess.

But I did nothing productive otherwise. I didn't do any gardening. I didn't go for a walk. I didn't run errands. I barely left the house. And I am glad I did. I was home by myself all day with the cats and enjoyed it. Except for the big mess. Here it is.

I was trying to find some yarn and organize it. And there is more yarn in the basement.

DVR/Tivo dependency

Before breast cancer, I was perfectly happy with out cable tv and without recording certain shows. I would stay up late and watch shows and I would use commercials for food and bathroom breaks. 

Now I am a DVR/Tivo junky. I have probably nearly 20 shows I record and watch while too tired to do anything else. I am a fan of reality TV. (There I admitted it.) I prefer cooking shows, HGTV and Lifetime movies (but sometimes I think they take the same plot and recreate a new movie).

I realize technology has changed in the last six years as well but I am dependent.

Last night to my dismay I found out on Facebook that a favorite show had started a new season weeks ago and I DIDN'T KNOW IT!'We recently switched from a DVR to a Tivo due to technical issues and had to set up all our recordings again. Apparently I am not perfect. I will have to watch two episodes online before catching up on the TV.

See my dependency? Its a good thing I only work three days a week so I have time to watch all my shows.