The end of 2009

Now that we are at the end of 2009, it is time to ponder an exciting year. Actually there is not much of 2009 that I would like to duplicate. I mean it was a year of back pain, doctor appointments, and all sorts of fun adventures. Yes, vacation in Maine was great but back pain wasn't so much fun.

I will have to think of what I would like to happen in 2010 but first I would like to eliminate stress, back pain, and cancer, and feline (or other) types of diabetes, and lose 20 lbs. In 2008, I had more than 70 doctor appointments. In 2009, I had way too many doctor appointments and I only wanted 12.

I also want world peace, the end of green house gases, and clean water for all but in the meantime, I'll settle for a yummy breakfast, ponder my options, and get back to you.

The anti-stress blog

I am taking the most mature attitude I can when it comes to stress these days. I am ignoring it. The biggest thing I am ignoring is the fact that my husband, who has never had surgery, is having part of his colon removed next Friday so we can find out where he is in the Stage I to IV thing... Hoping for stage I but we'll know after that. There is nothing I can do in the meantime, so I am ignoring this, some of the time.

While he is hospitalized, I will get another fun back injection, which should help relieve some of my pain, but may not, but then again it might - insert tiny optimism here. But the last one was awful and did absolutely no good at all.

My ankle is not getting high marks for healing. It has actually been giving me all kinds of aches and pains so I think that means back to the doctor again after an MRI.

I am ignoring the evil co-worker stress - no I am not trying to steal your job, we have realigned some things so its now part of my job, get over it and if you say we can't use the microwave since your department got a new one, we'll be happy to say you can't use our office refrigerator. Shut up and play nice!

In the meantime, my brother is coming to visit with two of his children (they will ignore all dust bunnies) which will be a big fun distraction. How to stay stressed while making brownies with a 7 year old or building blocks with a 5 year old?

The other patient in our house

Yes, there is a third patient in our house. The cat has diabetes. Today he is going to the vet for blood checks and a full physical (including shots). He hates the car. No, he doesn't hate the car, he is terrified of the car when it is moving. He is petrified. He turns into a shaking giant ball of fur. And he will be riding on my lap. Which means I will arrive covered in fur. This will be a very 'calm' event. but once that is behind us we can go about our day and retrieve him this afternoon for a repeat ride but slightly less fur covered because he always seems to know when he is going home. I have a list of doctor questions, a soft blanket to bring with us, and his lunch. (I am not kidding. He is probably the only cat who arrives at the vet with lunch. They look at me weird but feed him and report that he was starving for it. No he is not obese - he isn't even considered overweight any more.)

To recover from this ordeal, my husband and I are going out for breakfast at our favorite diner. Then I will do some work from home and meet a friend for a walk. A nice relaxing winter day.

I have made the executive decision that I am avoiding all thing stressful as much as possible in the next few weeks. I mean I live with back pain and seldom get a whole night's sleep (and was awake from 230am - 6am). Walter's surgery is next week which is providing enough stress for the two of us. The cat's vet visit is due to his lethargy recently where he slept through meals - and he is the feline garbage can who must be fed on time or early at all times. My ankle has been bothering me again. And then there are the evil co-workers who I am avoiding this week. I don't need any more stress thank you. I am doing just fine with what I have so far.

There are two sides to every argument

Okay, I read another article in the paper this morning (really someday I'll stop doing this) and it provides some good insight on teh two sides of the mammogram guidelines debate. It focuses on a woman who was part of the task force but who's family has a history of breast cancer. It does point out that everyone's cancer has their own story - cancer discovered by baseline mammograms at 40 that would be skipped if the guidelines were adopted. The whole science vs. fear discussion is blah, blah, blah, blah reiterated but it does conclude with a quote from the task force member that is really the whole point: ‘You really need to look at your personal needs and what you feel comfortable with - and what the evidence is saying.’

Anyway, so we are rounding out the holiday weekend and the cat doesn't seem to be his usual self. Yesterday he slept through dinner. This is a cat who is present for every possible meal and more. He slept from about 2 pm to 8 pm and didn't even flinch when I ran the can opener. Then he went back to bed. I am on hold with the vet right now to see if we can bring him in for a check up tomorrow morning.

Today we were going to do something exciting but there are pesky snow squalls due through here so we will have to find something a little closer to do. Otherwise, just another day with back pain....

Managing Up

I have always felt that part of doing your job right is to manage up. I used to work for a man with severe hearing problems, okay he was basically deaf. I would never go into his office and talk to him about issues. I would send him lots of emails and updates so he could understand what was going on and then discuss as needed. Talking just got him frustrated and cranky. I started a new job last May, I one of the things I made a point to do on my first day was to find out - where to leave information for my new boss (not on his messy desk, but on his chair) and how was the best way to communicate with him (stop by his office when he wasn't on the phone). This is managing up.

But this is a blog about medical crap, most of which is unfortunately my own crap, so this is about managing up with your doctors and other medical stuff. This article (I promise some day I will stop reading articles and critiquing them - right about when they find a cure for cancer) the other day covers it pretty well. Write stuff down, ask questions, find out what you need to know, and basically take charge. Don't wait for the magic healing fairy to flit through your life and fix everything, work with your doctors to find out. If your back hurts (like me) tell them when and why it hurts.

In addition to what is covered in the article, I would like to add a couple more.My primary care told me a few years ago, don't tell her about a pain, tell her the story about the pain. Keep track of when and why it hurts (sharp pains in my ankle on the treadmill for example instead of my ankle still hurts sometimes) and it makes her job easier to do and you get the benefit of quicker treatment.

Also, if you have any test - from blood taken to a scan or anything at all - the most important question to ask is when and how will I get the results. And if they don't get you the results, you can call and ask for them and find out what the results mean. Yesterday my husband got a blood test result in the mail as a follow up to his annual physical. The test was for his Vitamin D levels in his blood. He was actually just below the normal range but the doctor wrote on the printout 'Fine'. My husband's response was 'why is it fine if not in the normal range and what the heck is a Vitamin D test mean anyway?'

Managing up your doctors is key. (Managing up your spouse can be more important but that's another story...) Today is a rainy Sunday morning and after folding five loads of laundry, we are going out to brunch just because we want to.

The big decisions in medical care

There was an article in the New York Times the other day about the dilemma to provide more care to a patient who may never recover. Forget about the 'death panels' brought up by the opponents to the health care reform bill. This is not part of this discussion.

I have also wondered about this. When does a doctor or a patient say 'no more'? Every time I go in for surgery or a procedure, they ask if I have a living will (which I finally do) and I have discussed this with my husband and have my own thoughts on when I want treatment to end. But how does one make the decision? Is this a decision I will make on my own? Will a doctor make it? Will a doctor advise me? When does it become a case of throwing good money away?

The studies cited in the article show different sides of this issue. There is benefit to a point to keep on treating someone but how do you tell when its the wrong decision? And shouldn't the patient's wishes always be kept in the discussion and not ignored? This is the part where the living will comes into play. How's this for a nice morbid start for the day?

Anyway, we had a nice Christmas. And another dinner tonight. I think holidays are fattening.

Excuse me but it is still Christmas

Not that I am religious or anything but wouldn't it be nice to extend the holiday spirit into the holiday? The newspaper arrived fat with sale fliers for the post holiday clearance beginning tomorrow. My email was littered with clearance offers from various retailers. And I haven't even had breakfast and I feel like its over.

Well, we did have a nice evening of Chinese food and broke down and opened one gift each - actually I nagged until he agreed to one gift each. Then this morning we had stockings and gifts between us and what out of town relatives had sent. Now he is riding his bike and I am going for a walk and we will have more Christmas with my parents a little later and the more Christmas with my brother and his kids and my sister and her husband next week, which admittedly will expand into New Years. Its too early to end the holiday.

Now I did get some good gifts - like a new sports watch I really wanted to replace the one I had which no longer works. I didn't get the gift of a pain free back or a cancer free body but I'm working on those two. In the meantime, I am off for a walk so I can eat some healthy food later on. Merry Christmas everyone.