Monday, December 17, 2012

My Attitude Needs an Adjustment

I have been thinking (which we all know is not a good thing) recently and wonder if I have turned into a 'poor me'  person - the bane of all patients. The next step might be hypochondria - which we really do not need.

So  my medical life has been in a downward spiral for some years now. Its now at the point where my doctors have said to me 'you have been through a lot'. Most of my ailments have been ones I have dealt with, tightened my belt and moved on. But this rheumatoid and fibromyalgia stuff seems to be getting to me more than other ailments.

I have met all my personal medical requirements:
  1. I can't have an ailment that I can't spell or pronounce. 
  2. I have a treatment plan (for RA so far but not yet for fibro as they need to treat one first and then the other so we can tell if its working or not but there is a plan afoot for fibro as well).
  3. I have educated myself on both and joined online support groups.
  4. I will attend a monthly local chronic pain group.
  5. I can joke about it.
But I am not feeling my normal perky self. I went to a party Saturday night hosted by an old friend. By 'old' I mean since junior high. She has had rheumatoid since 2005, which is about when my health started its downward spiral. She very rarely talks about it. It is basically under control. She gives herself injections (something I am not sure I could do) and has been on a variety of medications. She doesn't seem to let it bother her as much as mine bothers me.

Before her party started, we managed to have a few minutes to talk about it. She said it took two years to get a diagnosis because she also had Lyme disease when her RA started. But she now really feels fine.

I decided I am jealous that she is in control of her RA (and still weighs the same that she did in high school). But two years to get it under control? I'm not sure I'm up to that.

But I digress. As I drove home from her party with my husband, I started to think. We left somewhat early because I got tired and was in pain. My friend and her husband were all going strong. I wanted to go home and go to bed.

I spent most of Sunday being lazy because I didn't have the 'oomph' to do much. While being lazy, I decided my attitude needs some adjustment so I can have more fun in my life and be perky again.

1 comment:

AnneMarie said...

Be gentle with yourself, sweet friend. Your attitude is fine and soon, I hope your body will catch up. It takes time and it comes in increments. I hope there is a big "incremental" difference coming quickly.

((hugs))

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