But first, a minor detour:
I blog. There are probably 1,000,000 other people out their blogging about their health? There are some who are very good and there are some who are very bad. There are those who meant to blog and startd out with 'Today I have another big scary doctor appointment. I'll fill you in later on what they told me' and we are left hanging with no more blog updates - did they give up their blog, did they lose their internet connection, did the scary doctor give them good news, did they get hit by a bus, did they die (it would be nice to have some sense of completion here), or any other number of reasons? But we would like to know and never will.
Some blogs are funny like Baldylocks (watch her new video on the right!) or Babs (I want a Jillie if I ever have to deal with this again) and allow us to see the humor in all this crap we call cancer. Some are heart wrenching - like Emily - she's too young for this. Some just show us the human side of our health and getting our lives backtogether - like Linda. Some are just plain enjoyable reading - like Debbie or Whitestone. And some are inspiring like Jothy. I can go on and on and on. I read any number of blogs each day. (This is one of the many reasons the internet has become a giant time suck for me.)
I also read the health sections of CNN and the NY Times regularly. I find some writers more inspiring than others. Sometimes they write about an ailment that I don't have - yes there are some I do not have. Today I am inspired by both Elizabeth Cohen who writes the Empowered Patient for CNN and by Christopher Hitchens, a contributing editor at Vanity Fair. Elizabeth writes today about why she writes her column - because of the issues she went through after the birth of her child. Christopher writes about his feelings with his diagnosis with what appears to be late stage esophageal cancer (he never says what exactly his diagnosis is - this is my non medical interpretation on what I understand are the facts as he states them).
For whatever the reasons we write or means to write, it allows us to express our feelings as well deal with trauma, stress, our failing bodies, our repetitive trips to the kind doctors who send us off on multiple medical excursions that usually include the words 'its might be a little uncomfortable' or 'you will feel a small pinch' or 'hold still and move as little as possible for the next sixty minutes' (and then your nose itches).
We write because we need to reach out to the outside world and say 'don't forget about me'. Perhaps we also write to inspire others. Or to just say I'm still here and don't plan on going any time soon.
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Well, today we are back in southern MN. I slept well last night and am on my own today - which we know always leads to trouble. My friend went to work. I am at her place by myself. We are having her father and his new wife over for dinner so I do need to cook and stuff but this is my to do list I sent to her at work, in no particular order
1. Figure out the damn tv again - every time I shut it off I have to figure it out again.
2. Finish messing up your kitchen - she thinks I'm rearranging it. (she said I could)
3. Finish waking up - not sure if that will be before or after #2
4. make lemon curd - I found the whipped cream attachment for the mixer. maybe make some pureed berries to go in the layers of the trifle.
5. Roast vegetables for soup - worst case, you can't borrow a blender, what do you think the whipped cream attachment would do to the soup? (And find the damn soup recipe we saw in a TV show on line so it might actually be edible.
6. Weeding - do you have any gardening implements that would help with dandelion removal or should I just search the garage? (No she has clippers only.)
7. Go for a walk to the arboretum
8. Nap
9. Do some work.
10. Finish my blog before noon.
So far I have finished #10.
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3 comments:
It is interesting about why we blog. I also concur with the blogs that just stop and we are left wondering what the heck happened.
Lately I'm trying to break back into my creative self. Whenever I finish my blog, I think it will be a completely different animal than when I started it.
Great post :)
Great post, Caroline! Thank you for your kind and generous compliment. I love reading your blog every day, too. I miss every once in a while, when I'm too worn out to read and write. Sounds like you're enjoying your trip. I'm glad you are. :-)
Thank you Caroline. I began blogging prior to cancer, and I found myself simply unable to stop. Now it is life, post cancer, and the writing turns to other things. Writing clarifies things for me. Somehow, when I see the words written down, things make sense that did not make sense just rolling around my mind.
But I am glad that we all write. I do think that it means something.
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