Warning

The crabby evil twin is here!

Well I did it

I did walk up the hill and not get winded or tired yesterday. I plan on repeating this every day this weekend and see how I do to make sure I don't need the blood and another shot! ICKY!!! (I really do hate needles. I see too many of them these days.) I did start work for my new job. It was nice to use my marketing brain again. (Yes I really do have a brain some place.)

I am also glad to report that my regular brain cells seem to be slowly returning to my head. I found my green pants that I lost about three weeks ago. Where were they you ask? Hanging in the closet where they belong but hiding behind some clothes that never get worn (and possibly should go to goodwill). This would be diminishing of spaceshotitis.

Anyhow, I feel relatively good today so far (but its early yet - only on my first cup of coffee). Have some errands to run and house work to do. Definitely want to get out and enjoy the last nice day of fall weather before the winter chill arrives!!! Actually, I just realized that I haven't really had any nausea for the better part of a week. I DO NOT MISS THAT!!!!! Cross your fingers it stays away!

Well, that was interesting

I woke up at 1230 in them morning with the skin crawling heebie jeebies again. While I am sure that is not a term found in a medical dictionary, I think it would make sense to the rest of the world. I did try to expand my wide ranging medical knowledge by looking these up on line and couldn't find anything about them in the side effects of all the drugs I was given yesterday. It didn't last long - 30 minutes or so - and then I went back to sleep. Yes, I will call the drs office today about it.

Otherwise, I feel okay. Walter commented that I seemed rather perky yesterday afternoon. I was starving as well - I am sure this is a result of the steroids. I was ready to eat everything in sight. I am not sure it will last as today I don't seem that ready to go do anything and definitely not as hungry. My first goal of the day is to go for a walk and walk up the hill on the way home with out stopping to see how I do. In thinking about it, I have stopped on the hill to rest every walk for the past several weeks. It didn't occur to me that this could be a result of the RBC issues from yesterday. We shall see.

I went, it was okay.

So I went for my second Taxol round. It was okay. Yes, the little needle (Its not that little, I saw it!!!!) into my port hurt, but less than last time. The nurse gave me some ice to put on it in addition to the analgesic cream I use. I also got a different anti allergy medication - Atarax, instead of Benadryl - and I didn't have a reaction to it. Its interesting how things they give you: anti allergy (Atarax), a steroid also to prevent allergies, anti nausea pill, Pepcid antacid, chemo and then when they are done they flush the port with saline and give me an anticoagulant to prevent clots. You wonder why I need a nap after to sleep it off.

The nurse did say she thinks I am handling Taxol well and it should not be too problematic. (That's her definition. I guess she has seen a lot of people deal with it so may be I am but in my opinion it is pretty crappy to get technical.) However I am getting anemic. She asked me if I have fatigue and shortness of breath. Well, I hadn't really noticed any. She asked the doctor if she should give me some blood and another drug for the anemia and he thinks no as I am not showing symptoms. But she jinxed me I think. She asked me and now maybe I think I am.

After my nap, I went for a little walk and had to rest walking up the hill on the way home. I hadn't really noticed. I will wait to tomorrow and see how it goes before calling them. If my red blood count gets too low, they will either have to give me blood at a chemo session, which they don't like to do, or delay a chemo session, which I don't really want (just want to get it over with). Maybe its just because of the little chemical factory they put in me earlier today.

I did ask also about eating an iron rich diet to help with this. Apparently, in this case it wont have much effect. The nurse did say it might come back up on its own. Grrr, grrr, grr. Another thing to deal with.

2 down, 10 to go.

Yesterday's question: what are the side effects of taxol?

Well, not as bad as my first set of chemo. I don't seem quite as tired, less nausea (yippee), food issues are some what better (but chocolate ice cream is the magic cure all - 2 pints of Ben & Jerry's on hand in the freezer), my digestive system is somewhat happier with me in general (occasionally it makes its presence known), and the fatigue (which is different than being tired) is there but not as over whelming. A lot of this is caused by low blood counts. Not just the white blood counts but the red blood counts (meaning anemia as I mentioned) and platelets. I am trying to eat more iron filled foods (steak, tuna, spinach, raisins, etc). However, the side effects are accumulating so they will probably get worse over the next 11 weeks. That is when the crabby evil twin appears and makes life miserable for everyone...

Now I have two part time jobs to balance and am trying to walk every day and need to take care of psycho kitty (he had some weird skin thing going on so he got a steroid shot which has turned him into an absolute pig with periodic running through the house... may need to call the vet again before we run out of cat food. Oink!). Otherwise, I am fine. I get tired. Take naps and go to bed at 9pm. Last night I made it until 930pm - yippee!

Of course I feel okay today because tomorrow is chemo day. Let's see if I have another allergic reaction and then sleep 14 hours.... Something to look forward to. See I do have interesting things going on in my life! NOT!

Its the little things that count

I got SEVEN hours of uninterrupted sleep last night!! Woo hoo! It was great. I feel like a normal human being, well at least for now. But am I normal? Now that is a different question - we won't go there! (I know there are some people who would want to argue that point but, look, just PRETEND I am normal at least some of the time. We can argue later.) After my fun with insomnia the other day, I said I am not going to nap during the day. I want to be tired so I can sleep many hours in a row. It took a few days but it worked. As long as the crabby evil twin doesn't show up while I am living in the land of the sleep deprived I think this system can work.

Today I am definitely going to get some ice cream. I didn't yesterday and was ready to go out last night and get some... Something with chocolate and nuts and chocolate chips and maybe coconut (but then Walter wouldn't want some - oh that means I wouldn't have to share.... Oops). Okay, maybe no coconut but chocolate sprinkles.... Hmmm. I can spend a long time deciding this one.

Now we are at that wonderful anti-food state

Nothing appeals. Toast and melon for breakfast. Left over vegetables and rice for lunch. But what to take out of the freezer for dinner? Tuna - no, chicken - no, steak - no, pork chops - no, ice cream - hmmmmm.... maybe... I might have to make a little detour today for some chocolate almond chip.... Now there's a nutritional meal.

But there is that little good vs. evil debate: Is it wrong to eat ice cream in front of your spouse for dinner while they have a healthy meal of salad and chicken? I don't think I should ask him because I have a funny feeling I would know what the answer is but it is something to contemplate. Well I could have a little chicken and salad followed by a big bowl of ice cream.