Friday, January 7, 2011

I am not inspired

I am not inspired this morning to blog. I don't know but my brain keeps jumping around on different topics. I was going to write about the doctor who distorted the autism-vaccination link. Then I was going to write about how I am doing. Then maybe about life with out cancer. But I am not inspired.

My blog is about me and my life with breast cancer. Well that's how it started. It is now about me and my life in the medical world. It is picked up in different places like Opposing Views and Before Its News. I guess they thought I write about interesting things. Or maybe they like my opinions because I have decided I have opinions about lots of things which I get to share here.

So my blog is about life with cancer. Yesterday some actress (who's name I didn't recognize and can't remember) said that she is celebrating five years of being cancer free. But what that means is that they can't find any cancer - not that she is cancer free. You can't go back and take the cancer out of your body. It may still be there so in my opinion she should really say they can't find any cancer. I would love to be cancer free but is that possible?

This is the problem with cancer. There is no cure. Once diagnosed, they do everything possible to remove it from your body but there isn't a guarantee they did. They do their best and that's it but they don't know if it worked. As a cancer patient, you just get doctor appointments for the rest of your life. My average right now for the past four years is some where over 60 annually. I already have a solid dozen scheduled for this year.

I guess I sort of had a rambling topic buried inside me. But now it is time to go feed the cat as he has been waiting (im)patiently on the floor next to me. If I make a move to get out of bed, he will jump to his feet and look at me to follow him to his food dish. I guess this is one of the little mundane activities in life that keep us going on without getting mired down with the trivialities of cancer.

3 comments:

wgasawoman said...

Hi Caroline. I just found you after spending way too much time traveling the land of blogs on this crazy topic. Anyway, your topic resonates - I have just come to acceptance that cancer is my new "life partner". What a crushing feeling. I have put off blogging because cancer keeps finding it's way into my writing. Finally, I have decided that I will start a blog on the topic because of how much yours helped me today.When I do, I will return and properly acknowledge your inspiration. Thanks, Sharon

Alli said...

Hi Caroline
You know when you are first diagnosed you want to fully concentrate on the daily feelings of living this new lifestyle with cancer. Believe me it can make you crazy because you feel there's no one on earth that understands except you. It's almost 2 years for me. My blog jumpa all over the place lol But one thing I can say is there is a lot of support and love among our bloggers.

Love Alli.....xx

cyn said...

Caroline, I think I did the same thing you did Friday morning! I could not nail down a topic (considered the vaccine fraud as well - what a sad, sad thing that doctor perpetuated). This happened right around Christmas too - I just could not find anything interesting to say though my head swirled with issues. I blame the blue funk I keep plunging into, where I cannot focus on anything except how crappy it feels to be me! :-)

And the notion of being cancer free! My mother-in-law keeps referring to how bad everything was last year but now everything is fixed and back to normal! Normal? NORMAL!?

:-)So for being uninspired, you sure managed to get a few of us thinking! Thanks!