Friday, May 27, 2011

Good behavior for your doctor's visit

I guess there are idiots out there because they wouldn't tell us not to do these things unless someone already had. I am kind of sick and tired of all these lists of things on the Internet. I think it is believed internet users have no attention span because everything is a list of things, or a series of photos of something related, or in other ways formatted for those with brains of a gnat who can't stop and read a paragraph. Anyway, here is another list I like: Things not to do at your doctor's office:

1. Talk on your cell phone - apparently this should be part of the hang up your phone campaign we need these days.
2. Lie to your doctor - of course you don't drink, don't smoke, wear your seat belt, get 8 hours of sleep, don't stress, and eat your veggies and fiber.
3. Can't describe your pain or other issues - 'doctor I get a pain in my eye when I drink my tea', 'well take the spoon out of your tea cup'
4. Forget to tell them why you were there in the first place - they don't want to hear about your day, they want to know what hurts or why are you worried.
5. Never tell them what you expect as a result of the visit - well, the doctor says 'you have cancer', my reply is 'well find a cure'. Am I unreasonable? Maybe.
6. Forget your medication list - if you take more than one pill a week, write it down unless you have a photographic memory.
7. Leave with concerns - I have learned to speak up and say 'um, well what about this too?'. At my last physical, my doctor said 'we will focus on this today and come back in a month for the test results and for the rest of the exam.' I guess my list was on the long side.
8. Medical records and images - I have all my doctors in the same place and they are electronically connected so I don't have to worry. But sometimes I have to tell them to dig through the last few months of tests and see how I was six months ago to compare. Its not just making sure your test results are there but that they look at old ones and new ones.
9. Chicken out of disagreeing with your doctor - a doctor is a service provider and if you don't like them, fire them the same way you would fire the plumber who ruined your plumbing.
10. Follow the treatment plan - My thoughts are a doctor tells you their recommendations for what you should do to treat your ailment. It is your choice to follow it but if you don't you should communicate this to your doctor - see above about lying to your doctor.

So that is my lessons on good behavior today - right up there with wear your good underwear in case anyone sees it at the doctor's office and bring a good book to prevent boredom while waiting around. (And wear really light weight clothing so you weigh as little as possible...)

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