Today feels like a Monday. Possibly this is because I usually get up and go to work on Tuesdays and Thursdays. This morning we are up early. I woke up in the middle of the night and went to get a glass of water out of the fridge and the cat woke up and wanted food. I gave him a few treats and then went back to bed. However, he was then awake and wanted breakfast and used his highly honed alarm clock skills and got my husband up early so I am up early. I will actually go to work early - the earlier I get there the sooner I get to leave.
Yesterday I gave myself a day off and went to the beach with a friend for the afternoon. It was a blast. We went for a walk on the beach which we both enjoy but our husbands, with whom we usually go to the beach, dislike. We agreed to go again. Yes I used sun screen. No I didn't get burned. And I took extra care of my arm but didn't wear my stupid sleeve on the beach because I am working on getting rid of my tan lines from the damn thing.
My back did okay but not great by the end of the day. I was catching up with an old friend on Facebook, actually someone who used to work for me, and she did point out that at least its not cancer. Perhaps I should stop whining about it as much but its hard not to whine about it when it bothers me on a daily basis.
Yes its not cancer. But the problem with cancer is even if you are told there is 'no evidence of disease' or NED, that just means that they can't find any right now. And they can never be sure they got it all. They can just say they can't find any evidence of it. Cancer needs to reach a certain size before it can be seen on tests and scans so you can have it and they can just not see it. Once you have cancer, that little lurking thought never goes away 'what if it comes back?'. This is why cancer people have more issues with depression and anxiety than healthy people.
Okay, time to stop whining and get my act together for the day. I still have to do all my damn exercises, take a shower, and figure out what I want to eat for lunch today.