They must have confused me with someone else

First of all, I would like to mention that yesterday somewhere online I was reading and people were using the word 'scanxiety' like it was a real word and not something made up by us cancer people. Then I looked it and here it is: scanxiety 'the tension which builds particulary amongst those who have or have had cancer as they move towards their regular check up scan, hyperscanxiety being the period as they await results!' I couldn't have said it better myself. I also agree with the hyperscanxiety which follows. Perhaps that is the state I am in now, combined with increasing back pain issues that allow me to whine a lot these days.

Anyway, yesterday I went off to my volunteering. I was going to the annual conference for the New England Direct Marketing Association where my official title is 'exhibitor wrangler'. This means when all the exhibitors come in, I help them find their booths and see if they have what they need to set up - like chairs and extension cords. And help them move around if they don't like where they are ('their booth is hiding my booth, they need to move it back'; 'that booth is blocking the wheelchair ramp, you need to move it'). But generally we have fun and sit around and talk and meet people that I met last year. This is I think my third year doing this but last night they told me they thought it was my fourth. This morning I go back to the conference and am due there at 7 am (which will be 715 at the rate I am going).

I got an email earlier this week saying I was invited to the dinner on Wednesday night. I politely declined as I had another meeting to attend. Then they asked me again and I said 'no really I have another commitment'. Yesterday when I arrived I was told 'are you sure you can't stay for dinner?' 'No sorry, I have a meeting from 6-8pm for another volunteer commitment.' 'Would you change your mind if I said you were getting an award at the dinner?' In that case, I did change my mind. I canceled on the other group, do feel guilty for it but did receive a 'Distinguished Service Award' for my skills in 'exhibitor wrangling' at the conference each year. I was totally surprised and very grateful. And it made me feel like may be I am getting back to being a normal person.

But the big news of the day is that Walter is coming home this morning and I don't have to pick him up tonight. Which i good because I am going to the conference until1 1245 pm and then going straight to work until 7 pm. He's cooking dinner. I will leave instructions. The cat is better. He is now done with antibiotics which is good because I was sick of the twice a day challenge. Now my back just has to stop hurting and I would feel lots better. But I am already running late so I have to get moving now!!!